Blustering Blackbeard's PC Was All At Sea, Sysadmin Got Him Shipshape In Seconds
The Register, Friday, March 13th, 2026
Have you tried turning it on, never mind off and on again? This week, meet a jolly reader we'll Regomize as "Roger" who thinks he may have broken our record for fastest tech support resolution, which we believe currently stands at 8.5 seconds.
Roger told us that 15 years ago he worked as a sysadmin for a government agency responsible for volunteer emergency marine rescue. His agency provided boats and other necessary kit that volunteers took to sea to sort out boating misadventures or rescue fisherfolk in distress.
"The man who managed this area was someone who could be transported back to a 1700s pirate ship," Roger told On Call. "Big, burly, sunburned skin, sun-bleached hair, even missing a couple of fingers."
"He was also one of those people whose face was always so red he looked like he was going to explode with barely contained rage at any moment, and he had a reputation to match."